A letter to the one who is considering ending it all.
Firstly, my heart aches imagining the internal pain you are currently experiencing. I’m sorry that you have begun to question the importance of your life. I’m sorry that life has become so painful that death appears more comforting than the present.
As I am the writer of this post, one would assume that I am the “knowledgeable other” therefore I can’t fully relate. This is far from the truth. Although I am not in a suicidal state, I have experienced what you are feeling. I can close my eyes and remember the instances where I was close to suicide and how alone and scared I felt. I know how it feels to stop yourself at the last minute and cry yourself to sleep. I know how it feels to feel overwhelmingly devastated, isolated and vulnerable- to have no one to share messy, unfiltered thoughts and feelings to. To be fearful of being deemed “too sensitive”, weak or an attention seeker. These fears can make you feel even more alone but equally more afraid of how you might hurt yourself if you are left alone.
Continue reading “If you are considering suicide…”
An interview with two Black Christian men sharing their experiences of depression
Being male is often associated with having physical and emotional strength. Although many men do possess these attributes, these attributes are often mistaken for indestructibility. In 2013, 78% percent of people who committed suicide were male and 22% were female (1). An even more nuanced glance is needed when statistics show that in the UK, young African Caribbean men are one of the most overrepresented BME groups in inpatient mental health services in the country (2). This is in juxtaposition to the lack of understanding/discussion about mental health in the black community. We can’t ignore these statistics, something is going wrong and in order to provide solutions we first need to understand the problem further.
Continue reading “Black, Male & Depressed – MHC Interview”
Many find it difficult to pick up the broken pieces of their soul after it’s been broken by people. It’s painful when the people who were supposed to love you cause you pain and those who were called to build you up broke you down. This can lead to the soul (mind, will, emotions) being in a broken and undeveloped state.
Often, we can identify when our soul is broken and many of you know when you’re not as emotionally healthy as you should be. You notice that past hurts have left you feeling emotionally paralysed; unable to live a joyful and fulfilled life. You have trust issues surrounding building new relationships and are trapped by unforgiveness and bitterness. You don’t enjoy being stuck in this place but there’s a mindset that often stops people from healing and this is the mindset I want to challenge in this blog post. It’s the mindset that you won’t begin your healing process until those that hurt you apologise first. This mindset tells you that if you were to pursue forgiveness before that point, you would be letting your abusers “win”. Continue reading “Pick up the broken pieces and forgive”
Valentine’s seems to be one of the few seasons where you suddenly become aware of your relationship status. For some, single or in a relationship, it ‘s an enjoyable period. For other’s it can feel overwhelming, lonely and disheartening. This is the group of people I am speaking to today. Not to make you feel stupid but to love on you, encourage you and hopefully set your heart back to peace again. In this post I will be asking you a series of questions and I want you to deeply think, consider and meditate on them. Most importantly I want you to be truthful to yourself regarding the answers. It’s when you are honest to yourself, even when it’s ugly, that you can pursue truth.
1. Do you compare yourself with others?
“Comparison is the thief of joy” is a saying that I believe holds a lot of weight. What comparison will make you do is diminish all the amazing things that are happening in your life and covet something that another individual has. Continue reading “Single, discouraged and lacking faith?”
Hebrews 11: 8-12 By faith Abraham, when he was called [by God], obeyed by going to a place which he was to receive as an inheritance; and he went, not knowing where he was going. 9 By faith he lived as a foreigner in the promised land, as in a strange land, living in tents [as nomads] with Isaac and Jacob, who were fellow heirs of the same promise. 10 For he was [waiting expectantly and confidently] looking forward to the city which has foundations, [an eternal, heavenly city] whose architect and builder is God. 11 By faith even Sarah herself received the ability to conceive [a child], even [when she was long] past the normal age for it, because she considered Him who had given her the promise to be reliable and true [to His word]. 12 So from one man, though he was [physically] as good as dead, were born as many descendants as the stars of heaven in number, and innumerable as the sand on the seashore.
Many of you experienced a tremendous amount of pressure in 2018. The workload increased and you wondered whether you could handle it all. At times, you even felt like it was unmanageable and felt tempted to pull back. There might have even been a temptation to withdraw from the responsibility and people you have been called to. Sometimes, when you’re carrying a weight that’s heavier than what you’ve carried before you can be tempted to give up. Continue reading “On the brink of promise…”
In my previous post, I discussed the first and second stages of a caterpillar turning into a butterfly. I ended my last post with the caterpillar shedding its skin until the caterpillar’s skin comes off for the final time. Under this old skin, is a hard protective layer and this layer is called a Chrysalis.
Chrysalis: What is it?
Chrysalis (pronounced Kry-sah-lis) comes from the Greek word ‘khrusallis’ which derives from ‘khrusos’ meaning gold (harūz’ in Hebrew). Continue reading “#Shift || When a Caterpillar turns into a Butterfly Pt. 2”
Recently I’ve found myself meditating on the process that a caterpillar takes to become a butterfly. I mean… isn’t it fascinating? A creature that had to roll and heave in order to move, months later is able to take flight above the branches it used to struggle on.
I believe that for many, their season of flying is nearing. They’ve had their caterpillar season and they are dreaming of their flight. The Lord has spoken about what the nature of their flight will look like, what colour their wings will be and how He will change their surroundings according to their new Continue reading “#Shift || When a Caterpillar turns into a Butterfly Pt. 1”
Isaiah 51: 3b He will make her wilderness like Eden,
And her desert like the garden of the Lord
We cannot dictate when God puts us into a wilderness season but what we can dictate is how long we spend in the Wilderness season. Our obedience can allow us to move with the perfect timing of God whereas our disobedience can delay our process (Exodus 16:35).
God’s desire is not for us to live in the Wilderness. God intentionally made the Garden of Eden and put man there to dwell (Genesis 2:4) . Eden was meant to be man’s habitation on earth and man was simply suppose to Continue reading “#Shift || From the Wilderness to Eden”
For some, Valentine can be a rough period for various reasons. It can make people feel inadequate for not being in a relationship. It can lead people to want to compromise and spend the day with someone they see no future with just to escape loneliness (if you are struggling with that click here
). Alongside this, it can be painful for those experiencing their first Valentine’s after a break-up. This, of course, is dependent on the circumstance of the break-up. However, if you are currently in the process of moving on from a breakup and adjusting to life without a significant other – it can be particularly difficult.
Continue reading “The Valentine after the break-up”
My mum often crushes pepper and spices. She likes to use a mixture of ingredients and crush them together by hand instead of using the blender. She argues that the pressure placed when she crushes the spices again and again together in a wooden pot is what truly gets all the juices out. The blender works… to some extent but nothing can replace the crushing of strong hands.
So as it is in the natural, it often is in the spiritual and 2017 for myself and I believe for many of you, was a crushing year. It was a year where the pressure applied to you was more than you’ve ever known. I’m referring to the kind of pressure that forces you to change in order to withstand it and brings out both the good and bad juices in you.
Continue reading “The pain of 2017; The glory of 2018”